Invasive cervical cancer, that is.

And I've thought long and hard about this whole blog thing. A part of me wants to do it and a part of me doesn't. The part of me that doesn't is the part that wants this whole ordeal to be the hell over, never to be thought of again and the other part of me knows that it could be good to just jot down what's going on, if for no other purpose than to compare my progress from one day to the next.

But the BLOG part vs. just a personal diary...I have struggled with that, too. I'm not sure that I really want to share my thoughts about what is going on with me simply because these thoughts might hurt or offend some people and that is not my goal. Yet I wouldn't mind sharing with some people, those who I know would read what I have to say and understand that it's not about them. And really, the fact that unless I specifically tell someone this blog is here, no one will ever know, which is how I plan to operate (and which is what I have done with my B-Blog anyway).

So about this whole cancer thing...

I was diagnosed with invasive cervical cancer, for the second time in my life (first time was in 2002), this past October. I cannot now remember the exact date, I think it might've been the 19th because I had a hysteroscopy on the 17th and by the 21st I was having a cone biopsy, but that seems like an awfully fast turnaround time...maybe Donald knows for sure, but at any rate, sometime mid-October.

The hysteroscopy. My GYN performed that procedure, which revealed the invasive squamous cell carcinoma. Then I saw a GYN oncologist, Dr. Jones (Cancer Centers of NC), who performed a cone biopsy that staged the cancer. Stage IB2. This means an early stage tumor >4cm.

Oh god, it's just too late to go on. I have a doctor's appt at 8:30 a.m. (seeing the chemo doc to let him know that I am going to go through with CT) and it's 11:15 already. I'll finish this up later.